Lately, I've been thinking a lot about my grandparents. In fact, on Easter night, after everything had settled down and we were at home, I was moved to tears while thinking of my grandmas. I was blessed, more so than most, because they were a HUGE presence in my life! We lived with one grandma and the other set of grandparents lived about a mile and a half away. Up until I was in 3rd grade, I saw both my mom's mom and my dad's parents almost daily! Most children can't say that these days. My dad's parents watched us while my mom and dad worked. Mom did Grandma's hair on Saturdays so they'd both be at our house for several hours then and we went to church with them or would have lunch with them on Sundays.
My mom's mom was a character (meaning, she was not your typical grandmother!). She was more at home at the bowling alley than almost anywhere else in the world. She spent almost every evening there. She had a bit of a wild streak. Looking her best was VERY important to her. She wore a ring on every finger and high heals until the doctor made her stop and even then, she refused to wear the typical grandma shoe. She wore Keds. She HAD to have a belt on. I think she felt naked without one. She loved us but it took a long time for me to realize that her love language was gifts so I often didn't see the way she showed us love as love. I probably took advantage of that a time or two. After a night of Bingo or a profitable trip to Atlantic City, she'd always slip me and Tab some cash. And, what's funny is that gift giving is one of my love languages. You'd think I'd recognize it sooner, but I didn't. One of my most favorite memories of her was that she took me and Tab to a restaurant one Sunday. I don't know where my parent's were but it was just the three of us. Somehow during lunch, the topic of the conversation was my mom's dad. We had never met him and while my mom talked about him, my grandma didn't really talk about him. She told us about his Navy days and how they met and how they got married on Valentine's Day. It was special, I think, because we got to see a softer side to her. She wasn't 'the sweet old lady' type of grandma until she got sick when I was in college. She had a stroke and that changed her personality. She became funny and not just because she would often call our dog a rabbit. I will always remember the night she met Reed. She was not at the bowling alley that night and I worried about her being at the house. She had a scarf on her head but she quickly pulled it off and shoved it down her blouse. She had to look her best, but didn't realize that her blouse was lumpy because of the scarf! She passed away when Anna was a baby. It breaks my heart that she didn't get to know her in the real sense of the word. She would have LOVED Anna. Anna is her kind of girl. She loves jewelry, all things glittery, and fashionable. I can picture my grandma taking Anna to get her nails done- something that wasn't that important to me or Tab- Anna would've loved!
Then there's my papa. He was the oldest of the 3 of them. He also lived to meet Emma and see Anna and Brayden walking. He was first and foremost a Godly man. He loved his church, his family and his Bible more than anything in this world. I have so many fond memories of my papa. Tab and I would sit on their swing out back and he'd climb on with us and blow into his glasses case and make a train whistle sound. That swing took us all over the place. He would garden with us. He was a very hard worker. He read his Bible every night, without fail, and then had some ice cream. He loved to watch Wheel of Fortune, Gun Smoke, Bay Watch, and Walker, Texas Ranger. He would laugh and laugh when we would climb up in his lap and kiss him on the neck. He used to do exercises and take walks to stay fit. He had one of those Russian fur hats. He would wear it when it was really cold out. I can also remember that he'd open his coat up and let us cuddle up against him as we waited for the bus. Tab and I used to dare him to kiss my grandma and he was so cute acting like he was getting away with something when he did it. He would sit and draw with us and play tic tac toe with us for hours. And, one of my favorite things he did was peal the apple we would have for an afternoon snack in one long string of peal. He also loved to play checkers. Reed and I went to visit him once after we moved away and Reed sat down to play checkers with my papa. He beat Reed the first game. Reed started off thinking he'd let my papa win but my papa surprised him. Reed won the second game but it was much closer than the first. When he passed away, it was not sad. He had gone HOME to be with his Savior and his wife, whom he loved dearly. He had outlived both of my grandmothers.
My Grandma Montgomery was the first of my grandparents to pass away and it was, by far, the hardest for me. I LOVED my grandma. We were extremely close and a lot alike. She was, in my eyes, the perfect grandma. She loved to be with us. She had gifts for us at every holiday and birthday but didn't spoil us. And they were poor so those gifts were a stretch for them so they were always meaningful. Often we got books from her and she would sign her name on the inside cover to let us know that they were given from her. I got my love of literature from her. She used to read books to me until she was hoarse. I think I even won some sort of award for having the most books read to me in Kindergarten because she read so much to me. She also loved her soaps. She was an ABC soap watcher so I grew up on One Life to Live, All My Children and General Hospital. I even remember watching The Edge of Night and Ryan's Hope with her! This meant lots of cuddle time. I used to play with her ear lobes and rub her arms as we watched TV in the afternoon or read books. She was also an AMAZING cook and baker. I can remember her home made biscuits and she was famous for her pineapple upside down cake. I can still remember it at most family gatherings in the green cake plate/carrier. She loved her family and loved to have everyone at their very tiny house! The fact that there was no room didn't bother her. She just loved that everyone was there. Even my mom's mom would often come to her house for family meals. Later I learned that in-laws who not only get along but who also consider each other friends are rare. Yes, I was extremely blessed that my grandparents were friends. I loved the way she smelled. She wore "White Shoulders" and used Caress soap. When she would come over on Saturday, I would try to hang out in the kitchen with her. It might have been to avoid chores... but it was also just because I loved being with her. I will never forget the week she spent in the hospital right before she passed away. I was in college and getting ready to go back to school. I remember being very scared. I had lost 2 uncles prior to her but she had never been seriously sick before. But, she was MY grandma. That's how I'd always thought of her anyway. She was mine and my other grandma was Tab's. I loved her like crazy! When I got the call that she had passed, I ran to the hospital and kissed her before they took her away. Her loss is still the hardest of them all. Maybe it's because she never met Reed or Anna. Maybe it's because of how much I loved her. I don't know but I often think about what she would think of Reed. She would've said that he's handsome, of that I'm sure!
That's not the end of the story though. They were, thankfully, all saved. And, I believe that I will see them again one day. I can't wait. But I still miss them now. Sometimes I miss them more than others. And, I really miss my grandma's pineapple upside down cake.
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